Child Custody After Khula or Divorce in Pakistan

When a marriage breaks down, emotions run high. For many mothers and fathers, the biggest question is not money – it is:

“Bachay kiske paas rahenge?”

Khula or divorce is one issue. Child custody is another, and family courts in Pakistan look at it very carefully.

This guide explains, in easy language:

How courts generally think about custody
What “welfare of the child” actually means
What rights both parents usually have

It is a general overview, not personal legal advice, but it will help you understand the basics before you talk to a lawyer.

Three Different Things: Khula, Divorce and Custody

In everyday talk, people mix up these terms. Legally, they are separate:

Khula / Divorce – how the marriage ends
Custody – who looks after the child on a daily basis
Visitation – how the other parent meets the child

A mother may get khula but still need to fight for custody. A father may grant divorce but still have visitation rights.

Family courts focus on one main principle:

The welfare and best interest of the child.

How Courts Generally See Child Custody

Every case is different, but there are some common patterns.

Age and stage of the child

Younger children often stay with the mother, especially in early years
As children grow, courts also look at school, routine and emotional stability

Character and environment

Courts consider:

Any issues like violence, neglect, addiction or serious misconduct
Whether the home environment is safe and stable
How each parent behaves during the dispute (especially in front of the child)

Financial support

The parent with custody must be able to handle day-to-day needs
But custody is not decided only on income
A parent who does not have custody may still pay maintenance

The child’s own view

For older children, courts sometimes ask the child in a careful manner. The child’s view is important but not the only factor.

Does Mother Automatically Get Custody After Khula?

There is a common belief that:

“Khula mil gaya to bachay to waise hi maa ke paas rahenge.”

In practice:

Mothers often get custody, especially for young children
But courts can change custody if the child’s welfare requires it
Fathers may get extensive visitation, weekend stays or, in some cases, custody when the facts support it

Courts look at behaviour over time, not just at one incident.

Rights of the Parent Who Does Not Have Custody

Even when one parent gets physical custody, the other parent usually has:

Visitation rights – regular meetings, weekends, holidays, etc.
A right to be informed about health and education
A say in important decisions for older children

If a parent blocks all contact without good reason, the court can:

Enforce visitation, and
In some situations, revisit custody arrangements

Practical Tips for Parents in Custody Situations

Try not to use the child to punish the other parent
Keep proof of your involvement: school visits, fees, medical records, etc.
Avoid speaking badly about the other parent in front of the child
If you feel the child is unsafe, talk openly with your lawyer about interim relief or protective orders

Courts appreciate parents who focus on the child’s stability instead of only winning the case.

When to Talk to a Family Lawyer

You should consider speaking to a family-lawyer when:

You are planning to start a khula or divorce case and want to understand custody risks
The other parent has already filed a custody case
You are being denied access to your child
You believe your child is in a harmful environment

A lawyer can:

Explain what is realistic in your situation
Help you file or defend custody and visitation petitions

Work on settlement options that protect your relationship with your child